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Thoughts, stories, ideas, recipes, cheers, and more... What else did you think you would get for a $1 tip?

For those of you looking for something on the more sophisticated side you have my apologies. This blog unfortunately mirrors the author (yours truly.) Some of the humor is not for everyone but I liked it and it's my blog so there! My patrons sometimes ask me where I come up with some of this stuff. I am glad to tell them my mind is a lot like Canada. It is sometimes a bit cold, there are a few dark corners, some of it down right confusing and even a bit dirty but there is also a lot of neat stuff up there. So I hope you all enjoy this blog! ... Cheers!

Friday, December 13, 2013

Reach for the Stars!

Today's message is one that is more say, inspirational? No that isn't it... Call it a pep talk of sorts. You see I work in Marketing by day and today being not unlike the others we as employees are always given goals to reach for. Goal that if met present one level of reward. If succeeded a higher level of reward and if not met at all a completely opposite penalty. Reminds me of the movie Glengarry Glen Ross. "First place in the sales contest you win a Cadillac El-Dorado, second place steak knives, third place your fired!"  I'll be sure to reference it below...

What I am talking about is just those very goals we are given and the importance we seem to place on these goals. I realize in life there is some importance to long term and short term goals alike however I have never been one to pay much attention to ones set before me in a corporate setting. Then there is the stress that comes along with them. Some people have them posted in the line of sight, some employees and managers check on those numbers almost by the minute as though their life depends on the next couple of seconds. Others have them committed to memory. The stress that must carry like a 800 lb. Gorilla in a backpack just on your posterior waiting to beat you down when you fail to reach this numerical summit and if it is ever met you are rewarded with a few extra dollars and walk with good posture for the rest of the day till the gorilla is set to mount you the next morning as you get into your first cup of coffee. And for what reason do we place all this un-needed pressure on ourselves and those below us? To make the almighty number which means more almighty dollars and the opportunity to do it all over again in the days and weeks that follow... Hooray...

I have a solution for all you live by the numbers and usually die by the numbers schlubs out there. To hell with the goals! Yes, the entire well being of your weekly pittance relies on your ability to produce and yes that production is measured against some brainiac's projection of how the year may turnout. I will still tell you, to hell with the goals! When they give them to you toss them out, file them under trash, wrap up dog pooh with them and set them ablaze on some ones door step but whatever you do, don't look at them!

 Allow me to explain... I was asked the other day what my goals where in relation to where I was in the month and if I was on track to meet them. My answer was a simple "I don't know." My boss was shocked. He couldn't believe I wasn't able to recite the goals for him. He couldn't understand how someone could not possibly have those numbers at their fingertips. It was almost to the point of blasphemy! He asked me if I was insane. He asked me if I had a termination wish. He wanted reasons and he wanted them pronto!

My explanation for it all went something like this... Say my job is to put eggs in a basket and my goal each day was to put between 8 - 10 eggs in this basket each day. If I accomplish this I receive $100 extra that week in my paycheck and if I put anything over 10 eggs in, I make $200 a week extra. Even if I love my job you can bet your ass I would work to get 11 eggs everyday, make my money and then my job would be DONE! I would never even come close to 12 and 15 would be a pipe dream.

Now let's toss out those numbers. Just come in everyday and just crush it! Come in with the thought in mind that today is going to be a great day. Like Vic Demone said in the movie Fast Times at Ridgemont High. "You don't care if she comes, lays, stays or prays. Whatever happens your toes are still tappin'." (Great words to live by.) So you have taken this ceiling and thrown it out. The only thing holding you down now is sheer gravity and for that you have a vehicle to get beyond the stars.

Your goal is nowhere to be seen to hold you down and now your only objective is to come and do the best job you can everyday. Some days you will fail and most days you will win because your heart and mind are in the right place. Those days you don't have as many little wins you will know it and just try to do better. Now you leave work each day and when you get into your car and ready to go home you know you did your best and life will go on tomorrow. More times than not you will find yourself on the north side of 20 eggs in that basket and the stress of worrying about this looming goal is lifted. Your overall demeanor is better. You smile more and you walk with the posture of a king/queen because you know you did the best you could everyday.

To HELL with those goals. Your new weekday schedule will go something like this... Wake-up, get to the office, CRUSH IT ALL DAY LONG!, bounce from the office and enjoy your life! You get the Cadillac El-Dorado.


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