Bless this Blog.

Looking for a Bartender for your next function? E-Mail or Call Me! (207) 432-5056

Thoughts, stories, ideas, recipes, cheers, and more... What else did you think you would get for a $1 tip?

For those of you looking for something on the more sophisticated side you have my apologies. This blog unfortunately mirrors the author (yours truly.) Some of the humor is not for everyone but I liked it and it's my blog so there! My patrons sometimes ask me where I come up with some of this stuff. I am glad to tell them my mind is a lot like Canada. It is sometimes a bit cold, there are a few dark corners, some of it down right confusing and even a bit dirty but there is also a lot of neat stuff up there. So I hope you all enjoy this blog! ... Cheers!

Tuesday, June 21, 2011

Peanut Butter Jelly Time!

I LOVE peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, this is no secret to anyone who truly knows me. What could be more simple and yet perfect blend of sweet and a bit healthy. Anytime I am rushing about and I need a good shot of energy and I can tell my tank is running low I stop and grab myself an 911 PB&J. There is a small supper market in Kennebunk, ME that sells a large PB&J for the kings ransom of $1! Could life be any better I submit it can not! The perfect remedy. So why should this week be any different? Answer... It's not! So this week I present to you PB&J in liquid form... Ahhhhh sweet relief! And don't try to screw with perfection here either. All these designer jellies and jams are just horking up an already flawless product. Let's not even get into companies that sell PB&J in the same container. Who the hell is that damn busy that they can't open 2 jars and use a knife to spread it on a plain piece of white bread? Lastly anyone who puts PB&J on anything other than plain white, wheat bread or between blueberry waffles (my own breakfast of champions, thank you!) Is either high (My good friend whom will remain nameless with PB&J Pretzels,) or should be removed from the general population and made an example of. Simple! Good! Food!

Peanut Butter
and Jelly Martini

2 oz. - Raspberry/Grape/ Blueberry/ Strawberry Vodka
1 oz. - Frangelico
Splash of Cranberry/ Grape juice

he Elvis Martini
1 oz. - Vanilla Vodka
1 oz. - Creme de Banana
1 oz. - Frangelico

Skittles PB & J
2 oz. - Grape/Strawberry Skittles Vodka
1 oz. - Frangelico
Splash of Cranberry

PB & J Shot
3/4 oz. - Chambord
3/4 oz. - Frangelico

Peanut Butter and Jelly on Steroids
2 oz. - Grape Vodka
1 oz. - NutLiquor Peanut Butter Vodka
Splash of Cream
Splash of Chambord
Splash of Frangelico
Rim glass with crushed Graham Crackers


Friday, June 17, 2011

The Perfect Mai Tai

A lot of people have asked me if I know how to make a Mai Tai and the answer is a resounding YES! Any bartender worth their salt has a good Mai Tai recipe up their sleeve, down their pants or in there coat pocket... I am no different, I just hide mine in a different place.

1 oz.- Silver Rum
1/2 oz. - Triple Sec
1/2 oz. - Amaretto
2 oz. - Sour mix
2 oz. - OJ
Splash of Genedine
Shake and pour over ice.
Top off with Dark Rum
Garnish with cherries, slice of Lime, and slice of Pineapple

Now go find a beach and relax already!!!

Wednesday, June 8, 2011

Skittles Infused Vodka... Taste the Rainbow!

This all started out with Charley is bored, as most things start off this way. It was the start of my shift and it was pretty quiet and I wanted something to do. For some unknown reason I had a bag of Skittles earlier that afternoon and remembered a friend telling me about her niece at M.I.T. concocting Skittles infused vodka. Ahhh the future of America is in good hands! Those wicked smart kids over there in Boston I think have struck on something pretty fantastic though. I am sure they are not the ones to come up with the idea that is for the Harvard kids across the street. The M.I.T. kids just find a way to make it better and then hire some poor Harvard law shlub to represent them in court when they have to answer to charges of copy-write infringement. Anyway as it goes I gave this Skittles idea a whirl....

I had my bar back for the night run out and grab 4 bags of Skittles the original flavors. We proceeded for the next hour to sort all the colors into little bowls. This story could go on and on so I'm going to cut to the chase. We used the red and yellow skittles to make strawberry lemonade flavor and next the purple to make the grape skittle flavor! The crowd went wild and it was simple to do... the end!

OK not quite the end. Here is how to make this infusion. It is pretty simple and it happens fast which is great because when a bunch of college kids want to get hammered they have the attention span of a gnat. So instead of the usual 3 to 5 days of infusion process this is more like 3 hours. So pick your flavors but don't just dump the bag in or else it comes out brown and tastes like poo. With 4 bags of candy I add a liter of vodka. In this case I used a potato vodka as it tends to be easier to infuse. Let this sit for about 3 hours stir occasionally. When the Skittles turn white they are done. Don't let it sit past that point or else it will turn chalky. If you do however just run it through a coffee filter and the problem is solved. This is a very sweet but extremely tasty infusion like going to the candy store but instead of hyper the effects of a few of these are a bit different. Below are the martini's I put together with these flavors. So taste the rainbow and give this infusion a shot!

Strawberry Lemonade Skittles Martini
2 oz. - Strawberry Lemon Skittles infused vodka
1 oz. - Sour mix
Shake over ice and strain
splash of Sprite
Garnish with a Strawberry

Goodness Grape-ous Skittles Martini
2 oz. - Grape Skittles infused vodka
1 oz. - White grape juice
Splash of sour mix
Squeeze 1 fresh lime slice
Shake over ice and strain
Rim glass with grape sugar

Taste the
2 oz. Grape Skittles infused vodka
1 oz. Navan Vanilla Brandy
1 oz. Pineapple juice
Splash of lime
Shake over ice and strain
Garnish with a cherry

Just one more to take this to the next level and my own personal creation...

Skittles Orange Julius
2 oz. - Vanilla Vodka infused with Orange Skittles
1 oz. - Creme de Banana
Splash of Cointreau
Splash of OJ
Blend with a scoop of ice to make frozen
Rim glass with orange sugar and garnish with an orange


Friday, June 3, 2011

The Salty Pretzel Shot

This one is a new one on me but just like anytime I hear of an interesting new drink I pass it along to you! This one comes to us from my southern belle friend Laura by way of South Carolina.

The Salty Pretzel Shot

Equal parts of the following:
Vanilla Vodka
Butterscotch Schnapps
Shake over ice and strain into a shot glass.
This is shot like bad tequila ... Lick the salt off your hand or someones body
Shoot the shot and bite a lemon

and repeat!


Thursday, June 2, 2011

Grab a Heiny

Wedding Bells for Alison & Sean and The Nubble Trouble

This past weekend I had the honor of meeting two young kids (Sean and Alison) in love who have decided to wed this coming weekend in Maine and spend a good portion of time at my bar amongst family and friends. As much as I would love to start in with all the typical jokes and wise cracks that pertain to the wonderful institution of marriage I will refrain from being that guy. You see Alison looks like she has been in a fight or two in her day and I'm not really feeling the need to have my ass kicked especially by her and a few members of her brides maids so again I will refrain although I have paid more for less in the past. I'm just saying is all! Now with all this love in the air and the sheer look of terror on Sean's face as he is told where to stand and what to say I will give Sean my only real good advice. Dude this has nothing to do with you and this is all about her. Trust me it will all pay off after the day is over when she lets you do all the weird stuff you have ever wanted to do to a woman to her in the hotel room that night. Ahhh yes I am such the romantic! So smile and big, shake everyone's hand and even kiss that overzealous aunt with all the lip hair because after a few drinks and lots of romantic moments you are in for some of the greatest times of your life!

Sean and Alison have a favorite drink and for them I will make the "Nubble Trouble" named for the famous Nubble Lighthouse in York, Maine, the drink of the week. So here's to both of you may you live a long and happy life together as man and wife.

Nubble Trouble
Over ice in a pint glass
2 oz. - Blueberry Vodka
1 oz. - Lemonchello
Fill with Lemonade
Splash of Club soda
Splash of lime
Garnish with a few Maine blueberries

The Week that was and the Memorial Day Martini

First off let me say I have been big time lazy as of late. I usually update this at the clip of at the minimum once a week and I just haven't done it at all the past couple weeks. Yeah it has been in the back of my head but if you have read this blog then you know what sort of dark corners lurk there. I would apologize for my lack of effort here but screw it! This is my blog and I will do as I wish! How's about them apples?! I also have some ideas for making it easier to find my martinis here on the site so be sure to keep an eye out for that as well.

So this past weekend was Memorial Day weekend and much like many Americans I took this long weekend to sit by the pool, have an American made beer and of course stuff my face with good old USDA choice steak made in the USA! God bless America! I definitely feel a little guilty seeing as time spent memorializing all the fallen soldiers was less time than I spent putting on sunscreen. However I did raise a glass to them all and even had a toast or two in their honor so I think we are good. I even came up with a new Memorial Day martini. This martini is light and sweet just like I like my women and much like any good woman she packs a punch if you have too many of them at once. But just like any good man that is a risk I am willing to take.

Memorial Day Martini
1 oz. - Citron Vodka
1 oz. - Hypnotiq
1 oz. - Blue Curacao
Splash of lime juice
Shake and strain into a martini glass
Pour grenadine down to the bottom.
Salute and drink!